What’s on your T-shirt?

Here’s a collection of T-shirt lines that can enhance your image [or spoil it]! You may have come across some of these while the rest should be really unique!

On the T-shirt (front):-

  1. Hell does not want me N I don’t want to be in heaven!
  2. Recession affects me also… I borrowed this one!
  3. I’m available… Conditions apply!
  4. I’m not totally useless… U can use me as a bad example.
  5. Take my advice… I am not using it anyways…!
  6. Take me… I’m easily recharged and affordable!
  7. As I said before, I do not REPEAT myself!
  8. At the end of the money, I have always some month left!!
  9. I started out with Nuthin… I still have most of it!
  10. My imaginary friend thinks you have mental problems…!
  11. Boredom is a syndrome I get and tend to pass it on!
  12. Don’t come close… I spread!
  13. Come closer… (in big text) U have to anyways, to read this! (written in small text)
  14. What’s my problem? YOU!
  15. Oops! You did it again!
  16. I am Ok… don’t know about you!
  17. I am a perfect idiot atleast! (with a smiley)
  18. My ATM has a mobile number! But, Dad rarely picks my call.
  19. Marriages are made in heaven… who’s spreading this?
  20. My pet name is U FOOL!
  21. You get out of my way or I will… (with a big smiley)
  22. Hello! What’s your size?
  23. Lucky you… You would have had me!
  24. Money is not my choice… Lend me some!
  25. I am too clever for U, so don’t bother me!
  26. Bored with life? Try me!
  27. I am committed… I committed suicide once!
  28. Gravity is a state of mind… You do fall when you are OFF!
  29. I am what you were looking for!
  30. If I am nobody, I am perfect.
  32. What makes you think I am insane? Tell  me soon or I will take off my clothes & dance naked.
  33. I don’t like girls… I don’t like boys also!
  34. I love myself… & I can’t take it anymore!
  35. Hey, we are living! There are no aliens!
  36. Someday I will get lucky… till then I will wait!
  37. How gay is me? I dated myself!
  38. Hey gorgeous! (in big text) I say that to myself! (in small text)
  39. I wish I was invisible… but no one sees me anyways!
  40. You’ve got Problems? I will give one too…! (with a devilish kind of smiley)
  41. You are an idiot… me too… lets party.
  42. What is your problem? Girlfriend or no girlfriend?
  43. Have fun… it is easy!
  44. I am smart, sexy & you need to pay the bill.
  45. I am single, available and lovable!
  46. What is your problem, you inscrutable, disgusting, insensitive beast!
  47. Nothing tastes like ice-cream… & I am nothing!!
  48. Sure, let’s make it happen tonite!
  49. I never said never in my life! That’s never my policy & never my line!
  50. Who said earth is round? We are all dizzy, u know?
  51. I am totally worth your Money!
  52. I don’t drink & drive… if it’s my car!!
  53. People are funny… they take this personally!
  54. Note: I could be sleep-walking!
  55. Dare to hate me! 
  56. Reality is an illusion caused by alcohol deficiency (with a half-empty beer glass picture).
  57. Tomorrow is a Future… Live now.
  58. Death is an experience… I died once!
  59. Alright, I am sorry!! UNF**K YOU!
  60. If I was a geek I would have done nothing to impress U!
  61. I am a MESS! (Mighty Enormous Super Size)
  62. I work hard, day & night to get lazy!
  63. I am bad, mad & sad… not necessarily in the same order.
  64. I am Lost! Find me!
  65. Am I your lucky sign!
  66. I took over Hell! Wanna come?
  67. Rule No. 1 – I have no rules!
  68. I don’t do married!
  69. Who cares for a, e, o… let’s focus on i and u…
  70. Forget it… Forget you read this!

Nobody is Ugly Betty

‘Beauty lies in the eyes of beholder and in the hands of surgeons!’ Today, when we say ‘A thing of beauty is joy forever’ most people especially women folk would literally want it to last forever. With all sorts of modern and cosmetic treatments available such as the Botox, liposuction, laser-surgery, implant-surgery, being beautiful on the outside is no longer restricted to age, stardom or considered exclusive. If you want it and you can afford it, it’s yours. Even side-effects are side-lined.

Is that why different varieties of facial creams, skin creams, beauty lotions, anti-ageing mix and such other types of product brands have been raiding the marketplace lately? Are they not aggressively advertised to woo the beauty conscious segments and keep them away from surgical beauty?

But then, what happens to the traditional beauty parlours and saloons…? What will beauticians do if people prefer to find their way to the surgical room rather than visit a parlour?

Not to worry actually… Just like supermarkets and hypermarkets cannot undermine the neighbourhood grocery stores, beauty parlours will remain as the ideal remedy for beauty solutions. And, of course surgeons don’t do routine jobs as plucking or shaping eye-brows or giving a facial massage.  

To get to the funny side of it, here are some statements that can straight away make its entry in a beautician’s work diary

  1. I don’t have to face job problems… my job is ‘Face problems!’
  2. They say ‘Beauty lies in the eyes of a beholder’ but sometimes I am forced to believe that ‘Beauty is lies’ or that ‘Beauty and the Beast are one & the same!’
  3. Never say beauty is skin deep otherwise no one would visit beauty parlours/saloons.
  4. My motto is ‘To beautify always’ but my secret motto is ‘Sparkle the mirrors with extra shine always’
  5. I could have tried being celebrity hair-stylist but then anybody can cut.
  6. Appearance is indeed deceptive.
  7. I am beautiful inside but my job is to make outside beautiful.
  8. A natural remedy for glowing skin is what I would look for but when it comes to people, they don’t want inner glow… they want instant glow… so, I rely on cosmetics.
  9. Today, I can’t say whether beauty spots are easier to find or spotting a beauty!!
  10. At least, people are honest in showing their real self while coming here.
  11. Being naturally good-looking – there isn’t such a thing these days…!!
  12. I will never call anybody ugly… the mirror does that job.
  13. Some people want to change their looks so badly that they end up looking bad but still like it only because it is different…!
  14. Sensitive skinned have to make-up their minds before they try make-up.
  15. Now the times are such that occasionally, I have to ask my customers as to which are their natural parts…!
  16. Age, wisdom and beauty – I can inter-relate all 3 in one go – As one’s age increases so does her/his wisdom to adopt modern methods to bring back beauty.

All of you who have read this… thanks… coz ‘you are Beautiful!!’ 🙂